Piper has reminded me that winter babies are hard.  Then on top of that a csection has made it harder to recover and find a routine.

I realise life makes it so easy to focus and complain on the negatives, I generally try to avoid that in life.  I was gutted to have a csection, Piper was my 5th child and I had managed to avoid a csection until then. The first week of recovery was horrible, but things got better after that. I am thankful and grateful to have no complications

I do feel different after a csection though, compared to normal births. 3 months in and my scar area still feels numb. I lack stomach strength. But what bothers me the most is that my stomach feels like it was torn apart, I’ll spare you the details, and that it will take much more effort to get it back into shape.

I could dwell on negative things, but I won’t. My focus now is on getting back into shape.  I started running again during Christmas time.  That was 7 weeks after birth.  I’m quite happy about that.  Especially as it’s not always easy to find the enthusiasm to run in the cold.  I’ve mostly been keeping it up, though the past week has been tough to find the time.

Sometimes I would stress out not finding the time to do the things I want to, but sometimes I figure it is best to let the stress and expectations go.  Today I took the 3 littles ones on a walk, it was cold so we ended up in a pub near our house!  But I figured it was a good couple hours out, a couple of hours that I would have normally used for my run, but ‘sacrificed’ to get the little ones out and also give my husband some peace, quiet and rest at home.

I’ll have some time tomorrow morning to do my run, so hopefully it will all be ok and balance in the end.

I think it is all too easy to fail at these good habits by giving up too easily. Using whatever excuse as a way to get out of doing the exercise.  I’m trying hard not to fall down that trap by accepting and believing that it’s ok to let things go sometimes, it’s a marathon, not a sprint, afterall.

One thing I do enjoy is looking back at my activity and stats.  After this preganancy I thought I was getting back into running much slower than after my last baby.  But as I looked back I realised that actually I’ve bounced back quicker.  What I think and feel is not always the truth, so it seems!

I created this image, which I’d like to continue to explore and creating one once a month as a way to keep the facts of the things  I’m doing.  What I add, I guess, may vary over time.  I’m hoping it will give me some perspective over time and *hopefully* motivate me as I see my self progress and improve my fitness.